• emeliathygesen

Honesty, tis' the season

Everyone hates honesty.

They want you to be honest, but as the famous George Carlin quote states: "Everyone appreciates your honesty until you're honest with them. Then you're an asshole."

But its like that every holiday season. I am asked why I do not "Make peace" with my adopted family. I tell them the truth, and no one wants to hear it. All the negative choices they have made, and continue to make are not something I want to put myself or anyone else through.

So I advocate for boundaries.

I actually had a professional tell me last week that I should be able to "erase" all my bad childhood memories because I spend the holidays with my chosen family. Trauma is not something that disappears. It fades, and becomes easier to handle each passing day. But the body remembers much much more than our minds. And that is the real struggle, to train ourselves that we are safe, and to function without constant fear.

And that is real honesty, admitting that you are struggling when others around you are not. Honesty is not being afraid to stand up for yourself.

Honesty is knowing you are worth much more than any holiday celebration.

You don't owe anyone any piece of you this holiday season. No amount of food, money, or empty promises should hold you to any abuse.


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