November is National Adoption Awareness Month. Most commonly created for the Rah Rah enthusiasm for getting children adopted or out of foster care, and getting kids families who don't have them. Needless to say Adoption is a good thing if its the last resort for a child. But there are many misconceptions about adoption.
First, most birth parents believe that children will "have a better life" when giving up their child. This ranges from adoptive families having a lot of money, being "stable" and married, to the area that they live in. But the reality is that, no placement is ever going to the best for any child. No one can predict how the parents act, if they become financially unstable, divorce, lack of parenting skills, abuse, neglect....the list can go on and on. There is really an illusion that is placed and manipulated by counties and agencies that putting a child up for adoption is the "only" or "best" option for them.
The next is the idea that an infant is a blank slate. Whether it be a local or foreign adoption with an infant, often times the adoptive parents think that child will be "typical". That the baby will grow and develop without any physical, emotional, or trauma issues. When in reality, that baby has genetics and experience from the womb that they bring with them, no matter what type of adoptive family they land into.
Last is the notion that adoptive parents are saving a kid from horrible family. I work with a lot of families who see the "horrors" of what they took away their child from. And swear that they will never let the child ever find out who their biological parents "really are". People make mistakes, people have flaws, but you can't tell a child that you can NEVER know your family. Having this type of mentality is also as bad as having sealed original birth certificates. No human knows better than an Adoptee and what they need. Even if it takes years and years of thinking about whether or not to reach out. We need CHOICE. We need to be HEARD.
So Adoptees are taking back #NAAM
With new Family First Prevention Services Act (read about here) the government is now SEEING that money should be spent more on keeping families together. Supporting biological families with services they need, and trying to keep kids with their families as much as possible.
Interested about #NAAM?
Here are some more online resources: